Wow, the Bozeman PD really delivered this week. Or, I suppose, it's really the people of Bozeman with their ridiculousness. Either way, it's time for another Misconduct Monday!
- A chipmunk was reported stuck between a window and a screen. An officer returned the call and “it appears the little guy got out.”
- A woman was stopped after driving several blocks with her hazard lights on. She said she didn’t know how to deactivate the flashers, so the officer helped her. Who gave this woman a license?
- An officer “helped a male tell his female roommate to share.” Sharing is caring.
- A 24-year-old Manhattan man was arrested for criminal mischief after being observed attempting to uproot at tree on East Main Street at 2 a.m.
- A 23-year-old woman who had been drinking was dropped on her head. Her friends thought she had a concussion. Sounds like a keg stand to me.
- An intoxicated man who wanted to detox said he felt like a “swamp monster.”
- A caller wanted to know if Big John’s Portable Restrooms was still in business. Bathroom emergency!
- A caller was upset about noise from street sweepers.
- Clothing with derogatory statements was found in a laundry room.
- A woman’s face and hair were burned when a paper shredder blew up in her face. This is not funny, just crazy.
- A caller was wondering if it’s legal to drive a lawnmower while intoxicated.
- A woman wanted to talk to a deputy about large satellites flying overhead that are “invading people’s privacy.” She told dispatch that they are going to jail because “the system has tried to kill her over 700 times.” She was advised not to call back but she called multiple times, “ranting about the Secret Service” and “stating satellites are the reason we had no winter.” Yeah, what happened to winter?!? Oh wait, I found it.
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